“I’ll do my dreaming with my eyes wide open, and I’ll do my looking back with my eyes closed.” – Tony Arata
I recently watched the fantastic film, Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Woody Allen has provided us with a very honest message about human nature and love. I found myself relating very much to Cristina. It was eye-opening. Everything from her “chronic dissatisfaction” to her love of photography, her appreciation of the arts despite lacking her own talent, her passion for new experiences, and her absolute confusion about what she really wants out of life & men. She, just like me, absolutely knows what she doesn’t want, but can’t for the life of her tell you what she does want. It was eerie to watch, but fascinating at the same time.
So I sit here pondering…what is it I want? I know at the moment, I absolutely, 100%, want to move to Europe. I have been considering where I wanted to end up for a while, because I’m pretty sure it’s not San Diego. I love this city…but I don’t feel it’s meant to be my permanent place. I have pondered so many American cities, but not until I returned from my trip to Europe, did I know where I wanted to go. Well, it’s Europe…of course…leave it to me to pick somewhere that is going to be very difficult to move to. Daunting almost. I have time…let’s see what happens.
In my dream, I think what I want looks like this:
In my dream, I am with an adorable, sweet intelligent British guy (sucker for the accent) that loves to read. He also loves American Football somehow, is funny and spontaneous, stands his ground, has a passion for history, art, and music and adores me. He teaches me new things and introduces me to his other interests that I don’t share. (Variety is key.) I have a darkroom in the basement as I learn photography, I also have a baby grand and am taking piano lessons, I have hopefully learned at least one foreign language fluently, and we spend 5 months out of every year traveling. My kids grow up with the same passion for the arts and literature… go to college, become successful and travel the world.
So there we are…I know a little bit about what I want! 🙂 Too specific, no?